The Cure for Leadership Fatigue

My personal journey to becoming a grace-giving leader was long. I began by striving to earn each leadership position by proving myself every step of the way. I did not understand that when God calls you to lead others,

He calls you by grace — not by works.

As an emerging leader without this understanding, I found myself wrestling with much uncertainty. Impatient to accomplish great things, I was often frustrated when obstacles were placed before me that seemed designed to hold me back. I was overly sensitive to other’s opinions and strove to please everyone. I had an insatiable yearning to make a difference in the world by being part of something meaningful, but I knew nothing about the importance of grace as a powerful tool of leadership. Instead, I thought the answer was to ignore the discomfort in my heart and to just work harder.

For years, I simply denied my feelings and just kept going. I wanted to prove myself to God and others. I did not want to stop and really look at the sensation of resistance that I later discovered was the presence of the Holy Spirit asking me to wait on His timing. I did not want to wait. After all, He created me competent with a willingness to help others. He put me in these leadership positions to do just that. So I pressed on adding even more projects and responsibilities in spite of my discomfort and impending burnout.By ignoring that nudging on my heart, I soon began to believe I was entitled to more leadership positions. I thought, “They owed me.” Somehow, someone was holding me back or even taking advantage of me.

This kind of self-centered thinking led to many frustrating days of waiting on promotions that I believed were long past due. I didn’t want to wait for what comes next. I was in a hurry.

Surely God needed me to keep pushing forward so I could get all His work done.

During those early years, I would feel my head press against a leadership lid, a limitation or even a glass ceiling, and I would think, “Surely someone will see that I have earned advancement.” When they didn’t notice or seem to care, I just performed more. Blame would race along the edges of my mind and injustice would scream for relief. It became easy to believe I was personally rejected or disqualified and that someone or something was holding me back. Was it because I was a woman? I often felt overlooked, disqualified, unchosen, and left out. I struggled with thoughts like: “Maybe I’m not called,” “God doesn’t like me, trust me or care about my feelings.” or “I must have missed it.” There was also a struggle with hopelessness.

I constantly battled the lies that my dreams will never come to pass and that I am doomed for failure and frustration.

My moment of truth came when I finally crashed, burned, and realized I was the one creating most of the proverbial glass ceilings all by myself. My need for recognition, acceptance, and success was creating a leadership lid on my life. I couldn’t be trusted by God to lead sooner or greater, because my own heart was not at peace. In His unsurpassed wisdom, God frustrated my plans and resisted my strategies in order to sift out my selfishness and insecurity. If I had advanced easily, according to my own plan of action, I would have spent my whole life trying to work to earn what God wanted to give me for free.

It’s called grace.

Every time I strove for recognition, He comforted me with His presence. Every time I wondered if my gender was the problem, He accepted me. Every time I wanted to shatter the hindrances and obstacles I perceived, He gave me the grace to wait.

This idea that I could change the way I view myself and others through a lens of grace instead of a lens of performance began as a seed of hope in my heart. That hope eventually broke through my hard shell of self-protection opening my eyes to the continuing patterns of self-sabotage that limited my leadership.

That season of growth and maturity eventually led to a greater intention on my part to learn from others, embrace my passion to lead, and allow God to stretch my understanding of what it means to do those things with grace.

Special Thanks to Propel Women for Featuring This Article

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*Excerpt from

The Grace Giving Leader

“Jan's passion is inspiring, her leadership is proven, and the wisdom she shares in The Grace-giving Leader will set you on a path to living a life of impact for God's Kingdom.”

— Christine Caine, Best-selling author, Founder of Propel Women & A21

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Featured Article by Jan Greenwood

5 Tips for Leading With Grace and Integrity in Your Life

Guest Blog by Marisa Donnelly.

To find out more about this Brave Strong Girl Mentor, simply visit her mentor profile right here!

What does it really mean to be a leader?

When I think of the word ‘leader,’ it’s often synonymous with strong, bold, or resilient. I picture a person—and often a woman—with her head held high, eyes straight, and a self-assured smile on her face. Leaders are powerful. Leaders are striking. And leaders just have this presence about them that makes you trust the words that leave their lips.

I always saw leadership as strength. But it wasn’t until my twenties that I realized true leaders don’t always have to be bold or the center of attention. There is a power in leading with softness, with gentleness, and with grace.

Here are a few ways you can try this in your own life and business:

1. Recognize your flaws

Here’s the funny thing—being a leader doesn’t mean that you have to get it all right. 

Somewhere along the journey we’ve confused authority with perfection and it’s simply not true. Even the best leaders made mistakes, fell down, and said the wrong things. Even the best Christ-followers hurt people or do things they regret.

Being a leader isn’t about knowing everything, having all the answers, or walking around with this air of blamelessness. In fact, some of the best leaders are the ones who recognize their flaws and actively (and often openly) work on them.

If you find that you’re struggling in this area, find a trusted person and ask them to help you. Speak with them about what you’re having trouble with, have them be critical of your performance, choices, or perspectives, and find small ways to see who you really are—behind the mask.

2. Lean on your support systems

One of the marks of a true leader is leaning on others around you. And this is true, isn’t it? Think of every movie or book—the real hero isn’t the lone wolf. It’s the lone wolf who ends up leading the pack. It’s the lone wolf who falls in love. It’s the lone wolf who brings people together.
And that’s what it’s all about—recognizing that we all need people—and to be the best leader you can be, you must lean on others as equally as you support them.

3. Acknowledge and embrace imperfection

There’s a difference between recognizing your flaws and working on them, and acknowledging and embracing imperfection. Hear me out: It’s easy to recognize things within ourselves sometimes (in fact, we’re often our own worst critics!) but when we acknowledge and embrace imperfection that means we are seeing ourselves and others for who we are—sinners, loved by God—and we are choosing to move forward in love anyways.

Acknowledging and embracing imperfection means saying, “I see you. I understand you. And I see and understand myself, too. I know we won’t ever be perfect, but we will try our hardest.” 

And there is power in bringing those words to the light. It frees you, empowers your team, and reminds everyone that in the mess of life, you can still move forward.

4. Defer to others for their expertise

Or, in other words: ask for help. 

This is probably one of the hardest things in the world, but it is necessary in order to be a good leader. Learn when you’re in over your head. Learn when it’s okay to reach out to others. Learn how to take as much as you give. 

In business, it’s also valuable to have an arsenal of people you can defer and refer to. You can’t always do and be everything, so having people you can rely on will lift your burdens while encouraging them, too.

5. Slow down

I write this point for you—but I also write it for myself. Slowing down is one of the most challenging parts of being someone who is driven to lead. You want to go, go, go and do, do, do. And shutting off that faucet of passion can feel debilitating at times.

But you have to remember that the best leaders need rest. 

The best leaders can lead when their cups are full.